Apollymi

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August 14th, 2018

Tuesday

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Seriously, how is it only Tuesday? I honestly woke up this morning being glad that I only had one more da left to open.... but no! It just had to still be Tuesday, didn't it? I'm not even sure how it's only Tuesday.

It's been such a long day, and I need to go collapse and make myself sleep, so I can go collapse on my, s

Aad yeah, I'm going on to bed now, I'm hopeful that it might not get late before I pass out. I'm so damn exhausted.

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August 13th, 2018

Monday again

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Somehow we're back around to Monday again. Between the train this morning and the train this evening, I managed to write some 1100 words, which isn't too shabby for a day that I couldn't handwrite at all. That said, I wanted to get a bit more done, but I'm just too damn exhausted. I could sleep for a year, if I didn't have to get up and go back to work in the morning. Glynda is gone all week, so I'm opening through Thursday.

[personal profile] katsuko and I did go by the Goodwill in Dunwoody. We ended up picking up a few things: 3 new work polos for her. As for me, I made out like a bandit: 1 new dress, 1 new skirt, 1 new pair of pants, and 2 new tops. I was hoping to find a maxi length black skirt I liked, but I struck out there, as well as on finding some leggings I could wear with my tunic length tops. I was not hugely hopeful on the latter front, but I am a little disappointed on the black maxi skirt front. Oh well. Maybe I'll hit the thrift store in Roswell and try again.

And yeah, I can barely keep my eyes open, so I'm going to start moving towards bed. Good night, all.

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August 12th, 2018

Noooo

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Somehow my entire Sunday is gone again already?! How does this shit keep happening?

Okay, granted, today was a lot of a repeat of yesterday: feeling like I'm getting yanked down into unconsciousness. I'm still not sure if this is something to be concerned about or if it's just thanks to my general lack of sleep during the week.

Tomorrow through Thursday, I'll be opening at work. I've already been told that there is a strong possibility that we'll be secret shopped again. All I know is to be looking for a black man in his 50s: no idea what test or anything. I even made a point of telling LaTrease, "No offense, but I'm not opening ever again: too much of this shit keeps happening on days when I open".

Damn, but I feel queasy. I think I'm going to have to dose with some Pepto Bismol before I go to bed. I know part of it is, sadly, the fact I'm hungry, which is a pain.

Anyway, I'm going to see if crashing will help with any or all of this. See everyone tomorrow.

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August 11th, 2018

Saturday

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I think I accidentally reenacted last Saturday, almost to a "t". Every time I sit still for more than a few minutes at the time, I feel like I'm being violently thrown into sleep. And since I'm trying to get writing done, I am definitely sitting still for more than a few minutes at the time. It's not a thing I'm enjoying because it's hitting me in the productivity.

It also makes me feel like I'm wasting my days off, and since I have to open Monday through Thursday next week, I would rather not feel like I'm wasting any more of my time away from GSU. There are, after all, some Mondays where it feels like I came home long enough to change clothes before going back. Which is obviously not cool.

That said, I'm not sure how much more awake I've got left in me. I keep feeling like I'm going just pull a full on pass out like this:

And I don't want to do that again, if I can help it.

So... good night, all.

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August 10th, 2018

At last

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Seriously, guys, I thought I was going to go quietly out of my mind waiting for 5:15 today. Then it wasn't any better, because I still had to walk to the train station in the heat, take the train all the way home, take a Lyft home, and then I could finally relax... which pretty much involved laying on the couch and playing games on my phone for hours on end. Such an exciting life I lead. I sure know how to rock a Friday night.

Okay, maybe not as much as [personal profile] katsuko who is asleep on the other end of the couch again. No shock there. Boo is reclining. Luci is sitting on the arm of the couch, getting her butt scratched like she likes. All in all, this is an exciting household.

But mostly, I'm just tired and hungry and wishing I had some damn peanut butter to snack on. I guess technically I do have some, but it's extra crunchy and I only like creamy. (First world problems, huh?)

Anyway, I guess I'm going to make myself go lay down so that [personal profile] katsuko can stretch out on the entire couch. Good night, all.

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August 9th, 2018

Thursday

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I'm finally actually tired. Like, I'm legitimately drifting in and out of consciousness as I sit here, and that's probably a sign that I need some damn sleep. And yet, at the same time, i'm a little worried that it'll end up being like last night and the night before: I'll go back the hall, I'll lay down in my bed... and nothing will happen for an hour or more. And that's a pain and a half. I don't need to keep waiting on sleep until the weekend.

That said, I think I'm going to go ahead and give it a try. Otherwise, I'll just sit here and keep rereading our older Mag7 fanfics.

Later, all.

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August 8th, 2018

Wednesday

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How the hell is it only Wednesday?! I swear this week is fucking dragging by, and I don't like it. I'm ready for this week to be over. I'm ready to have a few days to myself, with just [personal profile] katsuko and the kitties around. The girlies are still behaving themselves, able to tolerate being in the same room for more than two seconds at the time. Luci has pretty much quit chasing Boo, and Boo is hardly hissing at Luci at all lately. (Enough so that I was able to migrate Boo's dishes and litter box out of my bedroom and back into the rest of the house. Yayz!)

It only took them a year.

I managed all of an hour and a half's sleep last night. I need to make myself fall asleep faster, but I really don't want to have to drug myself to do it. Maybe last night's lack of sleep will translate into me falling asleep earlier tonight.

Finally, I have a freaking headache, and the lights hurt it, and sounds hurt it, and smells hurt it... and every time I get a cramp hurts it. Maybe sleep will help with that too, because I have no good way of calling out of work any time soon. Glynda is out all of next week (so I'll probably be opening again, though hopefully not working open to close again too), and I still need to find out if my schedule will change any next week or not.

Anyway, yeah... I'm going to sleep if laying down will help the head or anything else. Good night, all.

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August 7th, 2018

Tuesday

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Man, Tuesdays are always kind of weird at work. At least, for the most part, the testers were pretty nice today. As always, we had a couple of them (GACE) that didn't exactly respond well to Glynda's attitude, but I can't do anything about that. I can only do so much GACE whispering, after all.

I did a Hydroxycut this morning and another one at lunch. But I also had soda. I think I might have hit on why I had such a hard time getting to sleep yesterday and why I'm not tired tonight. It's late, but I'm really not tired. I'm hungry, but I'm not tired. Which sucks, because it's after midnight (ha ha!!) and I have to be up for work in a few hours. But yeah, hungry, with no peanut butter in sight and not too long before having to go lay down so that [personal profile] katsuko can at least get some sleep.

I need to find a way to balance this shit out. It looks like it was indeed the probiotics that caused the skin rash, which is both a bummer and a relief. Bummer, because it was supposed to help my digestion issues and nausea. Relief, because at least I don't have to quit taking the Hydroxycut. I'm not sure how well it was helping the weight loss, but it was certainly doing a lot towards keeping me awake at work. I might just have to cut out the afternoon dose or do the caffeine free one in the afternoons.

On a final note, I have a super affectionate Luci right next to me on the arm of the couch and a sweetly sleepy Boo napping on [personal profile] katsuko's leg on the other side of me. I like this.

And yeah, I guess I'm going to try to make myself sleep and ignore the growling stomach. I could stand to lose some weight anyway. Later, all.

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August 6th, 2018

Monday

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Yeah, it was a Monday. It was one hell of a Monday, because Glynda was in a right damn mood... and Richard was in a right damn mood... and it ended up being right at 5:15 when LaTrease told Anastasia and me to pack up and leave (before we get even more overtime built up)... and I didn't make it to the gym again today... and just everything else.

I did, however, manage to get my first actual appointment with my new dentist, even if it's not until September. I can deal with that. I think it's just going to be a cleaning and fitting me for my temporary dentures. That way, when I go back for my big oral surgery (12 damn extractions!), I'll have teeth to chew with immediately afterwards. That will be a good thing. I'm hoping we can spread some of this out over a few months, so that I have time to reacquire money in between, but we'll take it one day at a time.

Anyway, it's past time for me to go to bed. I'm going to give that a try, see if I can't make myself sleep, no matter that I'm still not particularly feeling tired.

So long, my freaky darlings!

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August 5th, 2018

Drifting

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I keep almost drifting off all damn day. It’s sad making, because I wanted to spend some time just enjoying my Sunday off, but nope, apparently, that’s not really going to happen. Granted, I’m pretty sure most of it is down to not sleep well last night, because I just couldn’t get down, but part of it is just going to be related to the work week... As in I tend to try to catch up on most of my sleep over the weekend, but I don’t think I’m ready to sacrifice my entire weekend to the cause. Or at least the greater part of my Sunday.

Things I still haven’t done yet: go grocery shopping, move the third litter box to the hall, eat real food at some point in the weekend, write more than a wee bit, batch made some meals for lunches, etc. Things I have managed to get done: kitty love love time, talk to Mum, edit some of the stuff I wrote over Camp, etc.

I’m going to read a bit more, and then I’m going to go on to bed. I’m not, strictly speaking, sleepy, but I’m tired. Hopefully that will translate to falling asleep once I’m horizontal.

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August 4th, 2018

Saturday

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Well, it was a nice Saturday. I didn't get to get the oil changed in the car like I intended, but I did have a nice day hanging with the girls and reading. That's pretty much all I did. I did eat the crisps I picked up at the Korean grocery store. And the cookies from there too. Whoops. In fact, the only real "meal" I ate today was leftover pizza. Whoops again.

That said, it was a damn nice Saturday. I hung out with my girls, which was nice, even if we didn't get a lot done.

I'm still tired and all, though, so I'm going to see about collapsing in my bed and seeing if I get sleepy once I'm there. So... good night, all.

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August 3rd, 2018

Images

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So [personal profile] katsuko is asleep on the other half of the couch from me, sound asleep. I glanced over and realized she accidentally managed to set up a gorgeous shot, so... yeah... new Hikari photos, yay! I sent her the best one, but I think she's too asleep to see it. Oh well. Darn. It really is a good picture: vaguely film noir, without me putting it through a black and white filter. Maybe I should try that one next.

I also have a Boo on me and a Luci nearby. They're doing a lot better towards getting along, as long as it's all on Boo's terms. So yes, they have made progress. I just hate that it's taken a year to get to this point.

I'm so glad the work week is up, even if it feels like it's only going to be a few hours before I go back again. Not even days: hours. That's probably not a great sign, huh?

Anyway, I'm going to finish typing up what I managed to sneakily handwrite today, and then I'm going to bed. Good night, all.

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August 2nd, 2018

Week

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It's only Thursday, but it's been a long week this week. I am going to be so damn glad when it's over tomorrow afternoon. (Yes, I am solely referring to the work week right now. Everything else is an entirely different kettle of fish.)

I feel so freaking drained, that I've honestly been looking forward to Friday at 5:15 since around... Monday or Tuesday. I need some "nap to recover from a writing month" time... and I only managed 31,000 words. But it was a pretty solid 31k, and I'm happy with it. I started something new. (Yes, again.)

I blame/thank [personal profile] sharpest_asp. The post about The Darkest Night gave me that list of tropes to play with. And apparently, I can be cruel to my characters.

And that's it. Bed now. [personal profile] katsuko is already snoring on the other end of the couch. Good night, my freaky darlings!

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August 1st, 2018

August

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I never thought I would say it, but I’m glad that Camp is over for the month. I’m oddly not looking forward to NaNoWriMo this year, and I think that’s just because I’m feeling hella overwhelmed. Of course, that might change between now and November. I’m not sure how it could at this point, but it might.

That said, I’m going to go throw myself at my bed, I think, and try to grab some actual sleep instead of passing out on the end of the couch. Later, all.

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July 31st, 2018

Camp NaNoWriMo July 2018 Edition - Day 31

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Well, I did it. I made it through Camp NaNoWriMo for another month. I had my goal set to 30,000, and I did manage to achieve that at least. I didn’t get much beyond that, but I hit my goal and that’s what I’m going with. I can live with anything at this point.

I got some nice compliments from the STEPs today. I always appreciate those. Like “you make terrible a lot easier” and “I appreciate coming out and seeing you smiling, I makes me feel more at ease” and so forth. I’m not sure if it would do any good to start inviting them to say these nice things on their survey at the end, so that my job continues to be safe... and so it is shown clearly that my habit of being as friendly as possible with the candidates is noticed by at least a few.

But I’m exhausted, so I’m going to go on and throw myself at my bed. Good night, all.

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July 30th, 2018

Camp NaNoWriMo July 2018 Edition - Day 30

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Well, today happened. That’s about the best I can say. Today happened and now it’s over, and I’m really, really ready for Friday.

All that said, I am PMSing like a motherfucker. I cried watching the movie [personal profile] katsuko dragged me to, Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again. I can count on my fingers the number of times I’ve cried watching movies or TV shows. A surprising number of them involve anime, but I ended up crying twice in this movie, which is a thing I try my level damn best to avoid. I’m not one of those who enjoys crying at movies, obviously. (Other signs of PMSing: cravings for cheesy stuff and chocolate but thankfully not at the same time, cramps, acne, and the urge to torture characters more than normal.)

Anyway, I guess I’m going to go try to get to bed. Wish me luck.

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July 29th, 2018

Camp NaNoWriMo July 2018 Edition - Day 29

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I’m hot and tired and cranky and hungry and thirsty. And there’s not a lot I can do about any of them. We’re running distinctly low on food at the house that isn’t for the cats. Oh, we have a few things here and there, mostly junk food and things that can be used with things we don’t have to make food. And what we do have isn’t exactly suitable for a late night meal. It’s meant to be a filling dinner, and that’s about it.

I think I’m finally caught back up on Camp NaNoWriMo, thanks to doing nearly 2200 words today. Granted, most of it was stupidly painful stuff, which is usually a good sign that I’m about to be on the rag. That does tend to be right about the time I torture my characters the most. Whoops.

Anyway, work starts back tomorrow, so I’m going to go throw myself at my bed and see what happens. Good night, all.

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July 28th, 2018

Camp NaNoWriMo July 2018 Edition - Day 28

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Well, I did the dentist thing this morning. I do have to say that it was most a consultation… one that involved a lot of X-Rays and such being taken, including one of my whole damn head. Apparently, this is going to involve less work than Mum feared but a whole lot more than I was anticipating. I will need to have oral surgery to remove 12 impacted or broken teeth, several of which have some level of infection around them. After that, I’ll need to get a temporary partial denture. Once my mouth has healed some from that, I’ll get a permanent partial denture. After my mouth has healed some from that, I’ll have to get at least four cavities filled and one root canal with a crown.

Now supposedly, my insurance will cover a large portion of this. The out of pocket expense for me, though, is going to be $2700 up to the partial denture part of that. I might have to wait until the next insurance year starts to get the rest of this done, because otherwise, it’s going to be all out of pocket. A good half of the ones I’m looking at now will be out of pocket, because my annual maximum is $1500. (Yes, my dental insurance literally has a maximum I can spend. WTF?)

Other than that, it’s been a relatively quiet day. I’m not sure what else to say. That’s been my sticker shock going on all day.

Anyway, I’m going to go throw myself at my bed and hope for sleep. If not sleep, then at least do some more writing. I’m not going to hit my goal of 2,000 words tonight, but maybe I can get a bit closer to being caught up. Either way, good night, all.

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July 27th, 2018

Camp NaNoWriMo July 2018 Edition - Day 27

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Oh thank fuck, it’s finally Friday. I was seriously starting to think (yet again) that it wasn’t going to arrive. And then I thought I was going to be at work for all of it. I feel like I live there most of the time anyway.

Tomorrow is my first dentist appointment in years. I’m both looking forward to it and not. I doubt anything much is going to be accomplished tomorrow. We just have to do a consultation and get an idea of what needs to be done and when and how much it will cost, with my crappy insurance.

And now, even though it’s relatively early for me, I’m going on to bed. Good night, all.

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July 26th, 2018

Camp NaNoWriMo July 2018 Edition - Day 26

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Is it Friday yet? I’m ready, really damn ready for this week to be over. It’s been long and it’s been tired an it be , and I’m all fed up with that. I’m tired of having to walk and do stuff when I hurt the way I’m hurting right now.. Every time I put the slightest bit of weight on my right ankle, it starts screaming in pain. Sounds like some, but I would prefer not to ever think about the stuff otherwise.

All that going on, I obviously don’t have a lot of writing done. I certainly haven’t done as much as I need to, do. Given that there are moments where I want to throw up if I step too wrong. I haven’t fallen lately. I haven’t done anything really that that would warrant . I haven’t fallen in nearly a month or so now. , And given that sometimes, just sometimes, that pain is what defines everything I do, I think it’s fairly all right for me to describe it as unbearable.

All that adds up to a pretty poor and miserable me. I haven’t felt like anything in a while, but getting from work to the train station nearly did me today, and that’s not awesome. After tomorrow, though, I can put it up for a bit and rest it ahead of Monday and going back to work. Except for my dentist appointment on Saturday morning, I have no plans whatsoever this weekend, except resting.

And now, I’m going to go throw myself at my bed and try to get a few hours sleep before I do everything all over again. (Really, it’s the thought that it’s Friday that’s sustaining me right now.) I’m tired as fuck, but I’m just hurting too much right now to actually really sleep. So right now, the whole sleep thing is just a hope, not a guarantee. But oh, I’m gonna try. And I’m off to go try that now.

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