Apollymi

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March 27th, 2017

Something

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What the fuck? Okay, yeah, no, what the actual fucking fuck?

The situation, Day 2 )

[personal profile] katsuko and I may have finally solved the relationship problems for Resurrectionist at last, with a little help from Hazel and Mist. That one was going to be a "get together" fic for Billy and Goodnight... and then I was motivated by spite and hate to go with other pairings. It became a Goodnight/Faraday fic, leading into a Goodnight/Vasquez/Faraday fic. We have a salty as fuck, hard ace Billy Rocks, and I'm happy with this.

And yeah, that's all I've got for myself. I have an early day tomorrow: taking [personal profile] katsuko to IKEA in time for her 7:00 shift. Then I have to get back to Mirko for the catering. Once that's done and delivered, I need to go back to IKEA to hang until she gets off work. Then I think we're going to the pub for a pint and pretzels.

So... later, all.

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March 25th, 2017

Sucks

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Today sucked.

I did the catering that Carlos volunteered me for today. So rather than have my day off, I had to go with [personal profile] katsuko to IKEA, so that we could both go get this delivered. Only, once we got there, someone had told the coordinator that we were supposed to do all the setup and so forth. Since we had to wait for the guy to come sign the slip and leave a tip, we did that.

Finally, the dude got there, and when presented with the check, he hands it over to his 16 year old to fill in the tip and sign. She leaves us $80 on nearly $2800 worth of food, with doing twice the world we were told to do. It comes to a 3% tip.

Carlos waived the delivery fee because the guy promised to "take good care of us". $80 is not "taking good care" of us. A 15% or 20% would have been "taking good care" of us. Yes, I will get a commission from this job that will be good, but it won't be until two or three weeks from now. It'll pay next month's rent, not this month's, which was what that tip was supposed to do.

So now I'm pissed. I've already told Carlos I will not be doing any of these for him ever again. My head is throbbing, and I'm pissed. Writing is not going to be occurring tonight, I don't think. I think I'm just going to take the cat off the keyboard, and try to nap away this headache. With a lot of Roo assistance.

Later, all.

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March 24th, 2017

Long day

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[personal profile] katsuko and I pretty much walked in the house ten minutes ago. She took fourth cut at work, hoping to make a little bit more money, but not so much. I mean, I think she made a bit after 8:30, but not as much as she had been hoping for. If that makes sense. I don't know if it does or doesn't, because I'm very freaking tired. I've slept about two hours over the past two days, thanks to a throbbing tooth keeping me awake.

I keep posting stories to AO3, even though I'm feeling more and more unloved by the day. The ones that are getting comments are not the ones I'm working... or if I've worked on bits of them, it's everything else getting the love. It's very discouraging.

But maybe with some sleep I'll be feeling more pleased with it. I don't know.

I heard back from GSU regarding the Testing Center Admin Coordinator. I'm currently a finalist for it, pending HR, credit checks, and background checks. So... maybe?

Tomorrow is the big catering order: nearly $3000 worth of food to be delivered. I'll get a 20% commission off of it in a few weeks, but supposedly, I should also be getting tipped off of it. I should additionally be getting tipped for the delivery I have to make on Sunday too, in addition to the commission. We'll see. If I do get tipped, it would be a huge step towards getting our rent paid on time with a minimum of overdrafting [personal profile] katsuko's account.

And that's all I've got for today. Later.

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March 23rd, 2017

Writing and Seven Seas

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[personal profile] katsuko and I finished a thing. It's only on AO3 right now, but it's cute and sweet and funny and needs to be read by all the people!

What I need to be working on is Wicked Ones. I'm fast catching up to where I am in writing, and neither [personal profile] katsuko nor I are currently working on it. I'm trying to, but Mean Faraday has a lot less to say when he's feeling less mean and more at peace. I'm pretty much stopped working on the AUs for Wicked Ones (Letter 'verse, Wild Horses, and Wandering Boys) until I get more done on the main verse, which doesn't seem to be happening very quickly.

What I have been working on is Monstrous: After Midnight and Resurrectionist. Because in Monstrous: After Midnight, I realized I needed to actually write some follow up to the mining camp scene, and because I felt like I needed to help out more with the story itself. And Resurrectionist is just fun and completely irreverent of actual canon: no one is meeting in the right order, everything has gone to shit, we're doing completely wrong pairings, and I want to see people collectively start losing their shit because it's going to take most/all of the story to get them to "right" pairings.

I'm working on editing a "light novel" for Seven Seas. It's long, and it's boring, and it's sorta meh... but it's still better than the Steampunk Dracula thing. I was sent the first roughly 100 pages to turn in by the 27th. I'm on page 52, so I'm doing okay, as far as I'm concerned. I don't actually know how long the novel itself is. I do know that I get paid $225 for the work, which is nothing to sneeze at. It won't pay this month's rent, but it might pay May's or June's.

And that's where I'm at for today. Later, all.

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March 22nd, 2017

Quickie

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This is just going to be another quickie post. It's not storming today or anything. I just want to get back to writing. I have a bit of a groove going on Resurrectionist, and I might have finally solved my problem with Wicked Ones, but I need to sit down and work on them to know for certain.

I have a phone interview tomorrow at 11, and I really, really want it to go well. It's in the GSU Library Special Collections, and I've missed Special Collections in particular and libraries in general.

And now it's time to go back to writing. Later, all.

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March 21st, 2017

Quickly

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This is going to have to be a hella fast entry, because our power keeps flickering with the storm going on outside. I don't know how much longer I'm going to have power and wifi to make this entry, so it has to be fast and now.

I think I mentioned that I emailed GSU about the Admin Coordinator job I applied for. I heard back yesterday, and they're currently verifying references. I also heard back from another job I applied for at GSU, this one in their library's Special Collections department. I would prefer the latter job, obviously. I miss my libraries. I miss my Special Collections.

But I don't want to get my hopes up. I will take either job. I will gladly take either job.

And zombie fic is coming along. It's coming along at the expense of everything else, but it is indeed coming along. And no, I haven't updated any of the places I usually post. I just have been too... something for that.

And the weather is picking back up, so I'm stopping now. Later, all.

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March 19th, 2017

Fuck everything

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I'm pretty sure that's all I've got to say for myself for today: fuck everything.

And let's start with fuck everything about Mirko Pasta. I'm so damn sick of this place. I'm not even sure I could stand to go back for food if I ever manage to quit for good.

The one upside is that I think I've finished making a playlist for zombie!fic.

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March 18th, 2017

Apparently, zombies

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So, despite my best intentions, I have 1300 words worth of world-building for a zombie fic. There's a further 800 words of character development. I'm slowly working through an origin story, and [personal profile] katsuko has done what will be the prologue.

So, yeah, apparently we're working on zombie fic now. I'm not sure how I feel about that. But we have the beginnings of a rather in depth world with characters that are still recognizable, despite the vastly AU setting. I've been asking the questions about how the world changes with a zombie apocalypse starting in January 1865.

How does this affect the war? Does it still end in April 1865? Does it drag on longer? Does it end sooner? How does it end? Is President Abraham Lincoln still assassinated? How does society cope with zombies? How does the contagion spread? What is the method of transmission? Where did it start? Do the characters know how it started? Did any of them witness the beginning?

What kind of relationships develop between characters? How do characters meet in this universe? Do the same relationships still form? If so, do they happen at the same time? How do the characters react to the zombie apocalypse? How does it change them from the canon versions?

No, seriously, I've put way too much information into a story that I don't even really want to write. But that doesn't mean I won't write it. Fic group seems interested enough in it. So, yeah, I'm thinking I'll share some of it, the beginnings of the website.

And now I think I'm going to try to finish getting this shit set up and then go the fuck to bed. Later, all.

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March 17th, 2017

A little something

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It's a couple hours yet until work at Mirko starts for the day. I've already dropped [personal profile] katsuko off at IKEA. I'm trying to talk myself out of writing a story that has been bugging me all day. I can't say that happens often. Usually I'm trying to talk myself into writing a thing.

Because I don't like zombie fics. I don't like zombie movies. I don't like zombies in general. But that's what the brain gremlins decided to give me. That's what I'm trying to avoid.

But I guess I'll see what happens. I'll try to work on Monstrous: After Midnight if I can't get Wicked Ones to talk to me instead.

Wish me luck!

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March 16th, 2017

Lazy day

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I did a whole lot of nothing today. I feel vaguely more human than I did yesterday or the day before, but I also feel like I could use two or three more days of this to be in a better place mentally. I'm still working on it, and mostly it involves sleeping a lot. But I'm getting there. I'm trying.

I still have moments where I just want to go jump off a bridge. I'm not exaggerating. I want to jump off a bridge. I'm afraid of heights. But no, my brain has decided that the 400-to-85N overpass looks really fucking appealing. I drive over it once a week, and I drive under it three or four times a week. It's a constant thought. I tell myself that rush hour traffic is bad enough without a body to contend with too. Some days it even helps.

What I haven't done yet today is write. I've answered questions about writing. I've read other people's writing. But I have done very little of my own.

I need Wicked Ones to talk to me. I need to know what the hell is going on in Joshua's head, post-confrontation with Goody. I know he's working his own way to a better mental place, but he's not 100% there yet.

Damn, I wish all my friends from all my fandoms would watch this movie. I appreciate all the reviews and such I've been getting, but there are just times I want to see what [personal profile] desolate03 or [personal profile] daimeryan_rei think of some of the crap I'm writing right now. Granted, some of the stories are so AU that you almost don't need to have seen the movie. But sometimes we just flat out skip scenes that we didn't change from the movie, so that doesn't actually work.

The cut on my hand is looking a little closer to healed. I almost think the part across the meat is nearly there. It's the part that's closer to the side and the nail that is still lingering. The butterfly bandages have done a great job of keeping it from moving and all, so it is getting a chance to heal up nicely. It ain't gonna be pretty, but hopefully sooner or later, it'll be healed up.

What little I have written today has been on Monstrous: After Midnight. I'm working on the final battle in chunks and pieces. I have a whole mess of things that have to happen. I need to get through the Gatling gun, Fae-raday being shot, Jack Horne turning wendigo, blowing up the Gatling gun, and the aftermath. I don't know what [personal profile] katsuko's plans are, if she's going to try to get us to the point I'm writing, if she's going to tackle the Bogue takedown, or what's happening.

And that's enough whinging for today. I've been working on this for well over an hour now. That's longer than any journal post of any length should take.

Later, all.

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March 15th, 2017

I'm just so damn...

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I'm just so damn drained. I don't think I've got a lot left in me for the rest of today.

On the one hand, I have words. On the other hand, most of them are journalling or answering questions about fics. Probably about 500 to 700 are from writing. That's... all right, I guess. I'm just not in a good place mentally speaking.

Which is sort of the understatement of the decade.

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March 14th, 2017

Vaguely annoyed

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I'm vaguely annoyed. Just vaguely, though, because Roo is a very sweet kitty man who just wants to help with all the things. Unfortunately his idea of helping is to walk all over the keyboard and constantly bring up the spotlight search tool on OSX. I don't even know how he does it, because it requires pressing both Command and the space key at the same time. Yes, they are right next to one another, but his feet aren't that big.

I have a conundrum, and I'm wondering if anyone else has an answer to it. How do you cut off Skype notifications when you are on a phone call? I got a phone call today while I was at IKEA. My little Skype group was going nuts. I had the app itself cut off during the phone call, but I was still getting notifications for every single message that comes through. I don't want to cut off all notifications, not completely, but I don't want to get them while I'm on a phone call. Can it be done? Or is this something I need to contact Skype support and request be added as a feature? (Because it seems like it should be common sense, IMO.)

And Roo is back in my lap again. However, this time I have thwarted him, because I went back to my bedroom and got my laptop stand. My laptop is no longer on top of my lap but rather is on the free-standing tray, and Roo cannot type. He seems to feel quite gypped about the whole thing.

Also, okay, it's halfway through March, and my area is now getting snow flurries. Snow flurries. In March. In Georgia. What the actual fuck? I don't like this.

I've been working on two parts for Monstrous: After Midnight... and they're both skip forwards. In other words, I'm working on the final battle when the story itself is still in the montage of preparations. I feel vaguely like I just need to get this shit done and over with. Everything. Nothing feels good with writing right now.

Nothing feels good with writing right now. That's a terrible thought to have. Writing is one of the few things I still enjoy doing, and this damn depression is starting to sink into it as well.

But I'm going to keep on trying to make things happen. That's all I can do, right?

So I'm going to go do that: make things happen.

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March 13th, 2017

Too much help

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Okay, I'm having way too much help in the field of doing... well, anything today. The new Skype group I'm in is entertaining as hell, too entertaining to get anything done around them. Coworkers were too loud at Mirko to get too much writing done, even after I was off the clock. And Roo is being too much of a help for me to accomplish much of anything now that I'm at home.

I did manage to get all the newest chapters of stories up on DarkMagick.net, Monstrous (as appropriate), and [community profile] eternal_sailorm. So I guess I should feel accomplished about this.

I also managed to drink something like 8 cups of tea between Starbucks and IKEA, so it's a wonder I didn't float off into space today. Or maybe the cider helped with that. Because I like my alcohol sweet, damn it. (Which might explain my enjoyment of mead, as well.)

I did get a little bit of handwriting stuff done while I was at the restaurant, so I'm going to work on getting it all typed up now, so I'll be cutting this off here.

Later, all.

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March 12th, 2017

So, yeah

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I got not a lot to say for myself today. I'm cramping like a motherfucker, but that only started this evening.

We got up this morning with the fullest of intentions of going to Urgent Care and getting my stitches taken out. When we got there, though, it was all "everyone should have been telling you that you can't have them removed here without having to pay extra, because your insurance doesn't cover doing that here". If I did it like the previous two doctors had told me to do, it would have been at least another $65 to $80, on top of the copay for the visit itself. We had to put change into dollars to put in the bank to get up the $20 copay, so there was no way we could do $100.

Got home and I text Mum to let her know what was going on. To say she was pissed would be an understatement. She immediately started texting Jesse and coordinating and shit. And then she started texting us everything we would need to take out my stitches ourselves. And we did. I cut, and [personal profile] katsuko removed. It took us all of 10 minutes, and most of that was because I couldn't get the scissors under the last stitch.

I still feel like I'm being held together with spit and a prayer, but that's more on an emotion level. The hand might be painful and less than perfect, but it's in decent enough shape. So long as I don't overdo anything, I should actually even be okay.

A lot of that "spit and a prayer" feeling comes from work. I'm just so... about it all. If I had another job lined up, I would quit in a heartbeat. Half a heartbeat. But I don't. And I can't seem to snag one. And it's making me crazy. Crazier. Something.

And yeah, that's about it. I did my own damn surgery today, even if it was fairly minor. I damn near lost my mind at work. I'm taking Thursday off so that I don't have to work with Josh's bitch ass two days in a row. So I will be away from the job from Tuesday afternoon through until Friday morning's catering. So maybe I'll be in a mental place where I can handle work again soon. Hopefully. Maybe.

And that is definitely it. Later, all.

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March 11th, 2017

Lazy

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I have had a lazy, lazy day. And I'm happy with this. I hung out with the kitties, I read for a bit, and I watched Primeval with [personal profile] katsuko off and on throughout the day. It's a nice change from everything else we've been watching, but it does mean that we haven't accomplished much for the day.

We've mostly stared at Tumblr and Scrivener and tried to make things happen, but that hasn't work. We've also joined a Skype group of some of the other Magnificent Seven writers. Not all that many of them, but some of them are ones I've enjoyed. But so far they've all be so nice. That's a good thing.

Roo has finally managed to happy drool on the trackpad so much that it's not working. Thankfully, I do still have the wireless mouse, but I don't like having to use it. It's not my favorite thing to deal with. It's better than nothing or trying to figure out keyboard shortcuts, though, so I'm doing it.

And yeah, that's about all I've got for today. I'm still tired and just... detached. I'm going to sit on my couch, and I'm going to eat some damn jellybeans. That's going to be about it.

Later, all.

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March 10th, 2017

Something

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It's been a long, long shitty day. I have a whole lot of not wanting to go back to Mirko Pasta ever again. I know I'll have to, of course, because I need the fucking money, but I seriously don't want to. I want to just... sleep. That's it.

I just want to sleep.

I'm just so damn tired of... everything. What's getting me through: reviews, friendly folks on the various websites, and [personal profile] katsuko and the kitties.

I'm just so damn tired.

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March 9th, 2017

Grumpy

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Okay, I will warn the world that today was a grumpy ass day, and I'm glad it's almost over.

Everything has been plucking at my nerves, and I really, really don't like it. Newest server has marinated in his cologne? Teeth-grittingly annoying. Claudio keeps hovering at host stand? Annoying. Claudio shows me the ongoing security camera footage of his dog sitting in the doorway... every thirty or so minutes? Annoying. Servers hanging out at host stand to check their phones? Annoying. Newest server is arrogant and thinks he knows everything, but still has to ask for help with so much stuff and still doesn't understand sections? Annoying. Sitting down at the bar and positioning myself so that no one will be near me... and then Claudio pulls a barstool over to me? Let me pull my hair out annoying.

I have only managed a little bit of writing today, and that's annoying as piss too. I've stayed over 1,000 words every day this month so far, and I don't want to break that streak.

I did manage to get regular verse Wicked Ones Joshua to talk to me a bit again. He's... mostly moving towards a better mental place, but he's not quite there yet. He's got quite a ways to go. But he's trying, poor boy. Poor, grumpy boy. I'm going to need to slip him back into the beginnings of the dark place he used to be, though, because I kind of want to write the fight that drove the brothers apart for the last section of Wicked Ones: The Early Years. Because I want to twist the knife on them one last time before I let them be happy again.

Nothing else is really happening with these boys. Monstrous: After Midnight talked a little bit to [personal profile] katsuko the other day. Lev7 is being quiet, mostly because Goody is annoyed at Chisolm and Faraday is a bit shocked at being defended. Trinity is close enough to done that nothing more is really needed from me, aside from some editing. Mostly I've been working on the AUs, because they're eating at my soul. I did manage some, again, on the regular verse of Wicked Ones, but I'm not sure what the point of this particular scene is, other than to have something on Day 4 in Rose Creek. Finally, Memento Mori... I haven't even opened the document all week. I'm a little embarrassed about this. This is why I'm still on the third part of Chapter One, even though I've been working on it since November.

And yeah, that's about all I've got to say for myself for today. Still grumpy, still tired, still ingesting way too tea. All that in mind, I'm going to try to make words happen. Later, all.

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March 8th, 2017

Updating the things

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So my hand ended up hurting too badly for me to even try to sleep last night, meaning I got less than an hour overall throughout the night. That in mind, I got out of bed a few dozen times to fuss about with the bandages, trying to loosen them to the point that it no longer hurt but would still stay on. I'd get it to what I thought would be a happy place, go back to bed, catch a few minutes sleep, then wake up with it hurting all over again.

So around 8:00, I went ahead and got out of bed to get ready to go to the Urgent Care. I woke [personal profile] katsuko up with the intention of telling her I was leaving and would be back, but she decided to go too. We got there by 8:45, saw the doctor by 9:15, and were out by 9:45. Doctor Patel was in and out in under 2 minutes, of course, but this is how doctors are, I've found. All the nurses I saw were excellent, though, and they who count, as far as I'm concerned. I'm supposed to start leaving it to air out a bit and only cover it to sleep and go to work. So that's fine. I'm also supposed to never, ever use Neosporin on it: only Vaseline. Which is funny to me, because I only used Neosporin because the LPN told me to.

It's also funny to me because it feels like medicine coming around full circle from where it was in the points of history I've been researching for The Magnificent Seven stories.

Everything above the cut is aggressively numb, which I guess is a good thing. Everything below the cut hurts and aches. The cut itself? It feels sort of... stretched. It only hurts if I move it too much and/or too fast or if something touches it too hard. Soft pressure? Okay. Gentle palpitations? Okay. Sudden movement? Not okay. Anything with pressure? Not okay. Anything weighty against it? Definitely not okay.

I didn't mention this to [personal profile] katsuko before today. But when I originally cut it and saw the depth of the cut (nearly halfway through the finger), my initial and completely numb thought was "Well, hell, I've just degloved my finger". Because apparently my brain has retained too much information from crime dramas.

Don't look up 'degloving'. Just... don't. Or look it up but don't look at pictures. It's a good way to lose one's lunch.

And that's about all I've got updates on. Later, all.

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March 6th, 2017

Busy ass day

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I'm not even sure what to say for today.

I can safely state that my hand hurts worse today than it did yesterday, so obviously the lidocaine wore off quite thoroughly. We've been doing a bit of an emergency spot clean of the house, so it's definitely throbbing now.

[personal profile] katsuko and I could both swear that, when we moved into these apartments back in January 2016, we paid the $600 pet fee, spread between a few months. We got a notice on the door saying "You have pets and they aren't on your lease - fix this now". As well as one saying to clean the damn house, which we did. Oh god, how we've did. I hurt in all new ways than I was already hurting before. I'm actually waiting on the pain to die down a bit so that I can go to bed.

But I can't find any information with that kind of stuff on it, saying we paid or discussed it with her or writing. Looking back over the lease from last year, they put us down as having no pets, even though we provided information saying we do. So, I guess it'll be our word against theirs, and I imagine ours will lose, since it's apparently our verbal discussion versus their written information.

On a happier note, I did get everything up to date on [community profile] eternal_sailorm and DarkMagick.net, at least as far as The Magnificent Seven stories go. I also updated the Mag7 recommendations page too. So... productive, yes?

And I'm really out of things to talk about already. We need to be going to bed, so that we can get up and get interview/work ready in the morning ahead of [personal profile] katsuko's 7:00 a.m. shift, but all the cleaning we've done today means we're not tired. Sore? Yes. Hurting? Oh definitely. Shaky? Sadly so. But tired? Not even a little.

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February 26th, 2017

From Mirko

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I had intended to make a post before I left IKEA this morning, but you can see how well that worked out. I never managed to stay connected for more than five minutes at a time, and it's been a bit of an issue with trying to get anything done.

Of course, now I'm having the issue of people being noisy -- and nosy -- and that's a issue of a whole different sort. I didn't have to worry to much about people joining me at my sofa, because I sat crossways, which made a difference. No one joined me on the couch, but I did get a lot of dirty looks. I just decided I didn't care.

And now we're watching the Oscars, and I'm smiling over Chris Evans... because Chris Evans.

Anyway, later, all.

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